What eight years of motherhood teaches you

This photo was taken before I left the hospital with baby #2 in 2004. I was 4 years older and wiser than the first time, and I'm still learning every day.

I’ve collected a few of the most important things I’ve learned since becoming a mom eight years ago.

Don’t sweat what you can’t control, fix the things you can

1. Breastfeeding will be much easier and more enjoyable if you prepare in advance. Read a book, take a class or both. Since many of our own mothers are from a non-nursing generation, it’s hard for us to find free help after the baby is born.
2. My accountant (and friend) is a new mom and we concurred it should be common knowledge that it feels like the baby is born from your bottom after childbirth. She had to ask the nurse to make sure that was normal.
3. Your family life will be much richer if you understand sleep patterns. I recommend “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.”
4. Child-care options will occasionally fail and leave you feeling helpless. Sickness, laziness, natural disasters—don’t freak out when it happens, know it happens and work with it.
5. Make no firm declarations about how you’ll parent before you are one. I always knew my kids would go to public school. Now the tuition is automatically withdrawn monthly so I don’t have to think about it.
6. Boys may try to aim, but often fail. Make sure every toilet in your house is well-caulked around the base.
7. Children will hurt themselves. Don’t be too hard on yourself about scars or chipped teeth.
8. When your child stumbles, react to their reaction—not your own. They’re more resilient than we give them credit for and fragility can be a learned trait.

Anything else you would like to add?

One Response to “What eight years of motherhood teaches you”

1. Bill says:

   February 16, 2009 at 11:33 pm

   I love this list. Great job Jackie

   I would also say that, especially early, don’t be afraid to ask for help. We all think of ourselves as ‘super-parents’ but in reality if it is your first time you don’t have to know everything. Ask your parents or in-laws. You don’t have to follow their advice, but they’ll appreciate you asking. And it might give you another way to look at a problem.

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